The pita restaurant is open until 4 in the morning and located conveniently between a number of bars and the bus station. Suffice it to say that we cater to few people who are not drunk and/or insane riff-raff. I can tell that tonight will be different because the usual bag lady that walks up and down the street with a zip lock bag full of pills clenched in both hands before settling on a bench to stare at nothing is replaced with a younger bag lady who does the exact same thing. This leads me to believe that the city of Eugene hires bag ladies to uphold its image as a beacon of underacheivement, and that the usual bag lady must have called in sick so they had to have a bag lady from a different street cover her shift, because Thursday would be a bad night to go without bag ladies.
Now a chubby woman with a voice like a meat grinder enters the restaurant, orders food and sits down at a table. I think she might be insane because she occasionally barks gibberish and slaps herself in the face. She coughs very loudly and repeatedly picks up her food, then sets it down, then stands up and coughs and talks more gibberish, then sits back down. This goes on for a very long time before some drunk girl shows up. She apparently used to work here before I was hired. Her arrival is partly my fault; she called looking for the manager that she used to work with, and I pretended to be the manager in question just because I was bored and made small talk with her. When she arrives in person, I am ringing someone up. She walks behind the counter, reaches around me and grabs my dick through my pants. I turn and look at her. I do not find her attractve. She acts shocked, lets go of my dick, and says she thought I was someone else. I turn to the soda cooler to get said customer one of his products. Her hand digs aggressively at my ass. She sexually harasses me and the other employee for a couple more moments before sitting down with her food at the table next to the insane woman, whose dementia guides her food away from her mouth and into a troubled mass on the table. She does not know how to eat, so her chubbiness raises questions in my mind. The drunk girl is talking about sex with a sober guy sitting at her table who she doesn't know. She starts raving about oral sex. The crazy woman sets her hand to mouth coordinative mistakes aside for a moment so she can scream "BLOW JOBS!" over and over again very loudly. The drunk girl interprets this as interest in her topic and keeps prompting the woman to scream: "BLOW JOBS!...SUCKING DICK!...COCK SUCKING!" This goes on for a while.
really old months: