9/26/03
Wanted malt liquor. Called Brian and tried to talk him into a little booze run, but he was cooking dinner for his woman so he shot me down. Courtney called a few minutes later and requested again. Denied. Then JW called, and Brian's woman, Leanne, answered. Last time JW called my brother Leanne answered and said it wasn't a good time. JW asked why and she responded by verifying his suspicion that she was in fact giving Brian a blowjob, and relinquished his schlong long enough to answer the phone. Heh. True story. But yeah, she shot JW down because they were going to eat spaghetti and drink red wine and watch Moulin Rouge. It was to be an enchanted evening, for certain, until things went horribly wrong. We drove to Brian's house right as his roommates were arriving. They unlocked the door and let us in. I walked to Brian's room with JW and slung the door open to reveal the two young lovers in bed, dressed, but barely. He wore shorts, she wore boxers and some sassy little shirt thing. This would have been shocking enough to them, but to maximize the surprise attack, I was sporting my ninja suit. How often does a ninja walk in on you and your girl friend when you're about to watch a musical and get friendly? Not nearly often enough. I grabbed one of his ankles and began dragging him through the house while JW pacified Leanne by means of shoving and tracked down Brian's sandles while repeating "It's ok, everything is ok!" to make things seem alright to Leanne, for she is not yet accustomed to this nullified level of privacy. A power struggle followed, but soon enough the two lovers were in Courtney's car on their way to buy us 40's. We gave them enough money to get M&Ms for themselves, so everyone won. Old English and ninja suits make any night pretty ok, I think.

9/24/03
All I’ve done today was get up, put clothes on, walk across the street to an ice rink to apply for a job, get rejected because I know nothing about ice skating, then come home and take my clothes back off. Whoo.

9/23/03
Gave more plasma yet. $30 this time. Pretty sweet stuff. Then did some laundry. The most productive day I’ve had in a long time. JW and I stopped by a party real quick, and a fridge raid revealed a bottle of vodka. It went down JW’s pants and now it lives in our fridge.

9/21/03
Courtney was over, so she and JW went for a walk. He found a yard with a really big sunflower in it that he wanted to show her. Touching huh? I didn’t really think so, but that sort of thing is why I’m a lonely, bitter asshole constantly teetering on the border of alcoholism. Anyway, a cat followed them back to our house. I really like animals and I miss mine at home, so I was stoked. We took it in the house and let it explore and petted it and stuff. It was friendly. It purred a lot. Eventually we discovered a heart shaped name tag dangling from his collar that labeled him as “Moon Shade.” It also had his address. From this point on we formed a plan. First a heart of like size was drawn on notebook paper. “Violated” was written on it, then it was cut out and taped over the heart on Moon Shade’s collar. Heh. Cool. Then we put him on the couch and I removed my pants while Jesse took pictures of my various naked body parts invading the cat’s territory bubble with a vengeance. Meanwhile, Courtney sat on a chair and talked about how this really wasn’t amusing her and she didn’t think it was funny and so on. She’s a great girl and all but this is a facet of the creative process that many people don’t care to witness. Moon Shade made this really funny sound that wasn’t quite a growl, but you could tell he knew something was wrong. He calmed down though then we petted him again for a while before he took off. Er, before we released him rather. Yeah though, once we get the pictures developed, we can put them in the mail box for the address on the collar, and they’ll understand what violated means…

9/xx/03
Today I was walking to Courtney's house and I noticed some "Ederly Xing" signs next to the street that depicted a stick figure with awful posture and a cane in a crosswalk. I thought this was hilarious and after briefly observing one of these signs I continued to walk with something of a smile on my face. That made my day a little better. Then a guy passed me in the oncoming direction atop his bicycle, followed by a little girl, presumably his daughter. She looked really young, like four or something, and you could tell she thought she was having a really wild, good time on her little pink bike complete with training wheels. That made my day a little better. As I walked a few steps further I heard a loud sound and turned my head. I saw the little girl crashing through a metal chair outside a restaurant and swerving into a tree. That flat out made my fuckin' day.

9/19/03
Gave plasma today. It’s pretty much like giving blood. As near as I can tell they pump the blood out of you, filter out the good parts, then shoot all the stuff that's just for color back into your arm. That part feels weird. The guy who hooked me up to the machine didn’t really exude professionalism because he had dreadlocks down to his ass and he inserted the needle in such a way that bruised my arm. Oh well. I made $20. I was surprisingly afraid of the needle though, and they were playing “The Patriot” on the TV there for us to watch (JW says they always play bloody war movies) which almost made me cry a number of times. Therefore I felt my masculinity had been threatened. Luckily, that night we went to a punk show where in theory I could mosh my sorrows away and feel all big and stuff. Not quite. I moshed a good amount considering I’d given plasma just hours prior, but one time I was lunging at someone and got hit from behind. I went flying and that was fine with me but as I was approaching the ground some friendly fellow decided to help me to my feet. He put his left hand around me at my hip level and his right hand between my legs, firmly grasping my balls. I still had a good amount of velocity, so all this really did for me was change my trajectory and hurt. Since the human nutsack is not a load bearing structure, I pretty much just hit the ground at a different angle. The guy was still trying to lift but then I guess realized this was a poor idea because he patted me on the back and disappeared before I could get a look at him. So yeah, that was another interesting night. I guess. If you’re into that sort of thing.

9/14/03
Courtney got to town today, so we had my brother buy us a discounted gallon of wine at Safeway. It was only $6.29. What a steal! We also acquired an additional 12 pack of beer should it’s service be desired. Fucking a. We drained the wine proper at Courtney’s apartment, and I had a few beers on top of it. I remember JW helping me to the balcony in front to puke, but my first shot fell short and landed ON the balcony. When Courtney came out, she was asking what it was or something, and the best explanation I could come up with on the spot was kind of weak. I told her, “I saw a homeless guy running through here a minute ago with a ziplock bag full of already chewed meat and…” At that point I was trying to figure out how the bag spilled, but JW told me not to worry about it so I confessed. I took a shit in the bathroom later and there was wetness everywhere. I got real wet. I was hoping JW didn’t pee all over everything, cause I didn’t want to be drenched in his urine. Maybe the toilet was leaking? I don’t know. I lay face down in the living room sick as hell with some sort of wretched liquid all over me, and after that didn’t pan out I walked home and changed clothes. Woot woot.

9/10/03
On this Wednesday, Matt had just come home as I was getting out of bed, and apparently someone in an ally gave him a playstation 2. Complete with the box, receipts, a couple games, and an essay-like paper about how playstation 2’s are evil and will enslave you and destroy your will. We figured out this was true a couple days later when we were in a blood clinic trying to give enough blood to afford a TV to play it on. Jesse was the only guy that could give since Matt and I didn’t have our social security cards, and apparently while he was there a crazy guy started yelling and hitting the door to the clinic with his cane. We missed out. So yeah, since none of us can find jobs, Matt ended up returning the PS2.

9/9/03
Moved to Oregon today. Eugene, to be accurate. Decent place. I was up till six in the morning drinking and doing computer stuff the night before I left, but I got up at eleven, picked up Adam in CdA at about a quarter to four, and after then the 400 mile drive went surprisingly fast. I live here with JW and Matt. Of course our fucked up landlordlady charged us a $2,000 security deposit because she’d just replaced all of the appliances, but there are no appliances. No fridge, oven, anything. Crazy fucking woman. Gotta do something about that…